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[personal profile] fabrisse
The first and most important step toward success is the feeling that we can succeed.

- Nelson Boswell

This came as my inspirational message today. I know some of it's time of the month. Some of it's heat and humidity. But I just don't know that I can succeed. The last taste of success I had was the dinner parties I used to have at Waldeck Street.

I guess the cassoulet and carbonade flamande I made for [livejournal.com profile] thorbol last year would count too. And I did make a nice meal for new year's day and took at least some of my usual treats to the Buttery on New Year's Eve.

But those were just friends coming over to eat. Sometimes that included helping me cook or cleaning afterwards, but mostly it was just conviviality and a slightly more elaborate meal than I'd cook on a week night.

I don't qualify as a line cook. I can't find work as a secretary -- and I can be a terrific secretary, a regular Della Street. I can't find temp work. I can't find a permanent job.

The ideal job for me right now would be as a secretary to a few people at a university. I've been secretary to three different Deans and all of them liked my work. My main reason for wanting a university position is so that I can take classes -- maybe work for an advanced degree. At a university it would be part of my benefits package that I'd have either a reduced rate or a certain number of free credits. Things could move more quickly.

I still haven't heard from several of the jobs I've put in for, but every time I do hear, it's a negative.

Sorry for the self-pity. I'm just down.

Date: 2005-08-05 04:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rhiannonhero.livejournal.com
There's got to be nothing more ego-battering than looking for work. It's so disheartening on so many levels for anyone and everyone. I'll keep on hoping things come out better for you soon.

Date: 2005-08-05 07:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fabrisse.livejournal.com
Thank you, sweetie.

Date: 2005-08-05 05:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thorbol.livejournal.com
Well, the cassoulet and carbonade flamande certainly were successes. That was a good party, and you had a big part in making it so.

I wish I could say something useful and, better yet, comforting about this job search crap, especially since I now have to do one too. People with both talent and virtue, like you, should be the ones with the good jobs.

Date: 2005-08-05 07:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fabrisse.livejournal.com
I don't know that I have much talent or virtue. But I accept the compliment with heartfelt thanks.

Hugs.

Date: 2005-08-05 10:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] undauntra.livejournal.com
Hmm. What kind of jobs are you qualified for? I've recently gotten a new job (first paycheck today!), and we have all sorts of job openings - if you're willing to relocate here, at least.

Date: 2005-08-05 10:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fabrisse.livejournal.com
Secretarial. Clerical. Tech-support (but only lowest level). Help Desk. Tutor.

I'd love to be near you. It doesn't solve the time zone problem, but at this point, that's becoming less important than self-supporting.

How ya doin'? *G*


Date: 2005-08-06 01:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] moria923.livejournal.com
As [livejournal.com profile] thorbol pointed out to me the other day, believing that you will succeed may not always be as important as just being able to take the next step. I know this seems awfully hard when facing a lot of rejection. I wish there was something concrete I could do to help.

Date: 2005-08-06 04:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fabrisse.livejournal.com
Thank you. I know it's been a bad week for you, too.

I took a couple of little steps today. And I think my first step may be seeing if I can get a paper route. It sounds dumb, but it's a small start.

Date: 2005-08-08 03:13 am (UTC)
ext_2780: photo of Josh kissing drake from a promo for Merry Christmas Drake & Josh (there you are)
From: [identity profile] aizjanika.livejournal.com
{{{{hugs}}}}

I know I can't say much of comfort, but I know one of my friends' husbands--an engineer with an MBA who worked for NASA and then was wooed away by some other company a few years later--wanted to relocate and spent over two years searching for a job. It was a terribly disheartening experience and he wasn't out of work at the time either. Promises were made and not kept and...well, watching my friends go through that was hard enough for me, much less for them. :-(

I guess the reason I'm telling you this is that I think that right now, it's hard for anyone to get a job, regardless of their skills or the job they're looking for. My daughter had a very hard time finding a summer job this summer, too.

I also hope things get better for you. :-(

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