(no subject)

siderea has an interesting -- what's the word, challenge, meme, psych test -- at her LJ.

"So tell me what about me makes you envy me (if there is such a thing), then post this in your LJ and see what makes me envious of you."

I can think of several things, but in most cases, such as self-confidence, I have my own brand that works for me.

So. I envy her the fact that she knows what she wants and finds a way to go for it. I don't. I have failed at the big thing I really wanted to do, but that's not it. There are other things I've wanted, other lives I could lead and be content or even actively happy, so why can't I?

siderea worked out that no matter what she wanted to do, be, or have as a hobby, it would take money. She organized her life so that she had both the money and time to discover what she wanted to be when she grew up, and pay for the training. She takes long vacations because she made herself valuable enough to her company that she can take the time she needs to recharge.

I've been more of the proverbial grasshopper -- fitting from my family pedigree -- and am now homeless, jobless, and penniless. I'm hoping that I can find something to end situation number two which will take care of situations one and three. And siderea has given me the tools, in a way that my parents never did when we discussed finances and budgetting, to ensure that I will never be caught this way again.

But I envy the fact that she grokked this young and planned well. siderea's my favorite ant.